Step by step, my pulse pounds.
Right? Or left?
To go forward? Or to return?
Correct or incorrect...
Shock, joy, loneliness.
Even lost in the depths of this labyrinth, I keep walking.
I wonder what waits for me around the next corner?
Come on, everyone's watching Cosmos vs. Alien
Their battles are always marvelous
He commands a fleet, but he's really been an alien since before he was born
The distance between "micro" and "macro" is so important
At least when it comes to misunderstandings in space treaties
If it's this or be the second coming of Adam and Eve
Everyone's probably better off how they are now
Come on, take a closer look
Come on, be a little more eager
Come on, let's hold hands gently
Come on, put a smile on
Talk and talk, gossip up a storm
But soon it's more than just a joke
Cross the mountains, cross the valleys
Get to the planet he lives on
Come on, everyone's watching the captain, the queen, and the ace
Yes, the missile counterbarrage is ready
But the man aiming has really been an alien since before he was born
Now, the cosmos is space
It's just one wide sweep
The cosmos's sugary taste
It's just one sweet
Just a pinch of magic when you're together with her
Just a pinch of sugar and you can have her
My name is Ko Ichinomiya.
Scion of the Ichinomiya Company, one of the world's foremost firms.
That is... I was born with a silver spoon in my mouth.
But now,I'm living under a bridge that crosses the Arakawa, going by the name Recruit.
And then I ended up having to go all the way up to the headwaters of the Arakawa
in search of a baseball that'd been sent flying by some strage chain of events.
There, I had a strange meeting with a strange woman in strange clothes.
Its strangeness struck to the strange depths of my heart.
Welcome to the
Enjoy your trip!
colorful land
Saitama
Episode 116 "The Amazoness (and her Tengu) of the Colorful Land"
Surround him!
Wh-what are they!?
They're too fast to see!
I can't tell even when I can see them!
You'll never go back alive, foolish man who wandered into the Amazon.
Now that you've met the clan of warrior women, the Amazonesses!
Amazonesses? Amazon? That's funny, this looks like Saitama to me.
And you call yourself Amazonesses? Those guys in tengu masks are guys!
Well, they certainly are tengu,
but they're all hen tengu! Amazonesses!
You're making this too complicated!
No. They have to be guys, this has to be Saitama, and they aren't even really tengu.
This is exactly why I hate men!
Just because I'm a little tougher than some people,
they act like I'm butch or a tranny or from a B-movie or some mannequin!
They say I don't even blink!
I didn't go anywhere near that far!
What's with her? Are the people who live on the riverbank this weird everywhere?
Anyway, fine, whatever. I'm going home now.
I've gotta keep looking for that ball.
It kinda sucks whether I keep going or turn around.
Ball? Don't play dumb.
I know this is the treasure you're searching for.
Huh? Treasure?
What's with that flashy treasure chest?
The legendary treasure which grants divine power...
Legendary treasure?
Wait, does she really have some OOPARTS or something?
I'll show you just this once.
This is the God of the Amazon!
Master Softee!
You mustn't gaze upon it for too long.
The treasure chest must be kept closed to protect the environment.
If you're going to make such a big deal out of acting like this is the Amazon...
Then why the hell are you making such obvious Saitama jokes!?
The popular "Master Softee" is an ice-cream novelty produced in Saitama.
Episode 117 "The increasingly-mysterious Arakawa riverbank"
I won't let you lay a finger on Master Softee!
I don't even want to! I can just go buy it at a gas station!
I just came up here chasing a homerun someone hit! I live downstream!
God, admitting that depresses me.
You live downstream?
If you're just making that up, you'll regret it.
If you value your life, tell no lies!
We can see through your lies effortlessly!
Wait, are they going to tort—
You don't happen to have a driver's licence or ID you could show us, do you?
How about my insurance?
We'd really prefer a photo ID...
What do we do?
I'm not sure. This should be fine though.
You're sure?
Sure, as long as you bring a photo ID or a piece of mail addressed to you next time.
Yeah, that's good.
Looks like you're saved this time, boy.
That's such a letdown!
Wait, where are you even going so soon!?
We're done. Sorry to bother you.
How does that even do you any good!?
Even my video rental card would've been more helpful in figuring out where I live!
What, did you need something?
You're the ones who popped up and started interrogating me!
Who the hell are you!?
What's with him?
How rude!
Very well. I accept responsibility for showing him the treasure of the Amazon.
As such, it is my responsibility to deal with him.
They're not very good at whispering.
Miss Amazoness?
Amazoness? Who's that?
I'm just a friendly Saitama native, born and raised!
A high school girl who cares more for her phone than any bow and arrow!
Don't just turn around and give me that BS!
And doesn't this makeup make me look like Avril?
So why did you go and surround me!?
'Cuz you're lame?
You don't look anything like a schoolgirl, either!
Your skirt isn't the problem!
This guy really ticks me off.
Dammit!
We were already arguing, and now you want to make it even worse!?
Hear this!
These things you call "treasures"
are good for nothing but this!
Curse you!
So, what are you gonna do, schoolgi—
Wait, Amazoness!
Sorry... This should cloud your memories.
Am I going to die in Saitama, in a city of the Amazons?
No...
That wasn't a blowgun...
You'd better not be telling me that was a Cheeto!
Wait, where am I?
What were you doing, lying here dreaming of famous old junk food from Saitama?
Dreaming!?
Wonder if they'll ever put out a cucumber flavor.
Oh well, at least it looks like you found the ball.
All right, let's play some more baseball.
Hey, wait!
Where did they go!?
They?
That's right, it wasn't a dream!
I met an Amazoness and some tengu in Saitama!
Well, they were tengu, but they were hen tengu...
Sorry I made you go looking alone, Ric.
We've been putting too much responsibility on you.
Forgive us!
That's not the ending I'm looking for!
Please, be calm!
Why don't you have some mustard greens?
You're wrong! There really was an Amazoness!
There, there. I like Amazonesses too.
Don't worry, I like them just as much as you two.
They look so cool.
That's not what I mean!
That man... I'm amazed he was able to take that Master Softee in one blow...
At least we tricked him with fake Master Softee.
He's unlikely to get any closer to the real Master Softee.
Oh, boss?
Yeah, it went great!
And didn't you see him? Didn't he look so lame?
All right, time to start the patrol!
This must be it!
This time I've finally found it!
The Venusian base!
Episode 118 "Making one's will known"
This early-morning breeze is just great.
And look at all the songbirds on the bridge.
There's a person!
So you found him slung over a pillar?
He's so pale! He must have been there all night.
You're awake now?
Where am I?
Last night, I—
A group of eccentric youths hung me over a pillar!
What!?
The same kids who stole my pants and hung them up there!?
I... I see!
Meaning...
He's wearing some pretty odd clothes.
Did they stuff him into them?
I'll never forgive them for hanging people out to dry like that!
What could you possibly be talking about?
Not coming down was a miscalculation,
but I climbed up there of my own free will.
Without this special suit, I might have ended up nothing more than a few sun-charred bits...
Yo.
I heard we have a guest.
You two stay away for now.
In fact, don't show your face in the daylight at all.
You're—!
So you know them!?
I don't, but I most certainly do!
A kappa, and a star!
No, wait, perhaps a flower?
A flower? No way!
I'm a star, no matter how you look at it!
At first glance, he is a little bit rounded.
Sure is.
Oh, well, right. If you mean it that way, you're mostly right, but—
You're aliens! And Venusians, at that!
It was just as I thought!
And now that I know...
I, as the captain of the Earth Defence Force, cannot remain silent!
I will protect this blue and pure world!
Ric thought it would have been better to have left him there for the crows to pick at.
Episode 119 "Feeling"
Come on, calm down.
I know there are some scientists who think we kappa are descendants of aliens, but...
What!?
So, long ago—!?
Is this birds of a feather flocking together?
Come on, even if I'm a star, I'm not an alien.
I guess if you insist, I'm a "music-ian"?
Oh, so that's what planet you're from!?
They're going straight over each other's heads, but the feeling is definitely the same.
Leech, leech leech leech leech!
— It seems like he already fits in better here than I do.
— Oh, so this is the sound of the planet Musicia!
Wait, is this one of those moments where the population under the bridge increases!?
I won't just stay quiet while the level of insanity here gets cranked even higher!
But he's too nuts to go home even if I tell him to...
Very well! An eye for an eye, a nut for a nut!
I know perfectly well that you're aliens! Come along—
You're wrong.
I'm the alien.
I'm a Venusian!
What!?
Really!?
Huh, you never told me.
Great, I figured his ears would perk up at SF references.
I'm kinda worried that the other two are interested too, though.
Oh well.
Now all I have to do is play the evil alien and scare him off!
I see...
So you're the same kind of alien as that girl!?
That girl?
Don't play dumb!
That girl taking tremendous leaps with her eyes closed!
Oh, you saw Nino doing something while sleepwalking?
Yes... I saw it late a few nights ago!
Venus Jump!
Venus Cloth!
Egads!
This is terrible!
Venusians are already altering the genetic makeup of Earth life!
So he knows about Nino's fishing?
He must have had the bridge staked out for a while.
And your real form must be disguised as a snot bubble!
Host Control Antenna
Right there!
Nose, nose nose.
Foolish Earthlings, laugh while you still can.
Your true hell begins this very moment!
Come on, snot bubble, don't be so loud!
If someone hears us, our plans will be ruined!
Fine, fine, Antenna. You're still just as much of a worrywart as you were on Venus.
Only because of how easily you get carried away!
You've got a lot of nerve!
Hey, listen!
Like that!
Gah! You got me!
Keep going, keep going...
I knew it...
That's right. The girl you saw is one of my comrades.
But her power is on a whole different level.
A whole different level?
Foolish earthlings!
You created weapons for us Venusians without even realizing you were being used!
Come forth!
My servant!
There you go, there you go!
I—Impossible!
If she were serious, she could destroy the Earth in three days!
The peanut gallery doesn't have to gasp too.
Such fearsome aliens...
They're even more powerful than nukes!
But don't worry.
We rather like this planet right about now.
Then again, maybe she'll destroy it on a whim.
If you care for the fate of Earth,
leave here as soon as possible!
That did it!
He believed the whole thing!
Must... Must I flee?
Even though I know what evils we face, must I do nothing but ignore them?
Well, you don't need to blame yourself.
Just leave!
I want to fight!
But, alone...
I can't do anything against a foe like this alone...
Who's alone?
We're here, captain!
If we give up, it's the end of the world.
Gu... guys?
Now... Stand...
That's the true meaning of friendship!
When did that even start!?
At that moment, the lunatics were all on the same wavelength.
Episode 120 "Queen of Venus"
Let's go, everyone!
To protect our blue and pure world!
Sure thing!
Wait, why are you pulling out the big guns!?
Everything has a weak point, understood?
If we all pierce it...
All right! Got it!
Stop it! Don't make up plans!
What's going on?
It doesn't look like he's gonna leave, more like a weird team was just formed!
Even if I must sacrifice my life...
I shall defeat the Queen of Venus!
Hey...
Well crap. This might be dangerous for Nino.
I need to admit I was lying!
Hey, what's up? Someone I don't recognize?
The Queen of Venus!
The outside!?
Why hello, ma'am!
Nino, we've been talking about Venus with him.
Venus!?
Wait, you guys were just playing along!?
So you show yourself, Venusian!
I know your true form!
Oh? So you want to talk about Venus?
What are you doing!? Going for a weapon?
I knew I couldn't just—
There.
Damn you!
Using biological weapons!
How about that!?
Nino...
I won't allow the evil Venusians to have Earth!
— Don't think this is over!
— You're leaving already?
Aww, you made him cry.
He didn't even have the main dish...
Perhaps it was a bit too warm of a welcome.
The danger of an added resident on the riverbank was averted.
Looking back at the end of my journey,
as the days I long for pass
I see you wrapped in your red coat,
playing without waiting for winter
Farewell, mazelike days , I'd thank you if I realized days
Oh, oh, goodbye days
Looking forward at the beginning of my journey,
I take a deep breath so I won't have to stop
We're both swimming upstream toward tomorrow,
Swaying side to side like fish
Pain? No thank you days, sadness? No thank you days
Oh, oh goodbye days
Episode 121 "Arakawa Gag Contest"
Here's my gag.
The kind of face a pigeon makes when shot with a peashooter.
Sorry, but could one of you handle the peashooter?
Here's some peas, Last Samurai.
Shall I?
Yeah. Only a man among men with an unbending spirit like yours can do this.
Aim the peashooter well.
I shall undertake this!
He seems pretty serious about his peashooting.
Yeah. Deadly serious.
Man, everyone here's always so energetic.
That face isn't half bad for someone who just got hit by a peashooter.
Nice peashooter face!
Me? I'm the one making a peashooter face!?
That wasn't shooting peas!
This smell reminds me of the first time we met...
Women have such sharp memories.
After all, it was caused by the sexiest man in the world.
Even if I wanted to forget, I couldn't.
Such an unlucky woman.
That was a great show, bro!
T'was wonderful!
That was cool, Billy!
Wait, that was me! Me!
Hey, it really ticks me off how you don't care about preserving the Arakawa's riverbank!
You shouldn't just blow it off as a waste of time!
Next time, 3 Bridge×2.
Illustration: Taro★Mino
Omigawd, you, like, SO have to tune in next time!
To me, "light" means to be run by electricity.
First were the six days of biblical creation, and the seventh was used to watch secretly.
In eden there were one hundred and two to capture, and everything was completed.
The World God Only Knows has begun.